Guys' night out last night (and Kevin brought Melissa)

So, last night we all went to the pub, as usual. Shayne, Jarrod, Johnny, John, Kevin, Melissa, Corey, my friends from work Scott Simpson (a 30yr old alcoholic), and Scott Downing (a 40 something yr old who looks like Don Vito). We all got pretty nasty. Heather showed up right before we were gonna leave. John, Johnny, Kevin, Melissa, Jarrod, and I all started drinking at the apt as usual before we went to the bar. The patio got too small to hold us all so we left. Everyone else who was previously mentioned met us at the bar where we got shitty. Scott S. decided to buy everyone at the table a shot! Apparently he gets crazy when he is drunk. He bought all ten of us a shot. I got pretty drunk so I handed Kevin my keys. I gave him my keys so he could drive my car because I could barely walk. He and Melissa had been making out and all that shit all night....... they decide to take my keys, go to my apt, and have a quickie in my apt. They "say" they didnt do it in my bed, but who wouldnt. He said they had sex on the couch. I know theyre lying. I need to wash my sheets. They came back to the bar, I took my keys from him, drove home anyway (it's only a block away), and I cooked Hamburger helper for everyone, while drunk. I didnt even burn the house down!! Scott Graham came over and drank a bit and left. I went to bed. I woke up this afternoon and felt like shit. I feel better now though. Good times!!